Argh......... any body can help me think of a solution or not?

This is the situation... I have this REAL GREAT crush on a girl and ...sad to say she is the stead of my 'brother'... i asked him before what he would do to someone else likes her and what he said got me rather frustrated...


"I welcome any Competion"


haiz.... Guys... though i dont know you yet... care to offer a helping hand ? i am in total torment here...

~ruffy

give up. wait for the right person to come along. how old are you? I have a tough time understanding why young people nowadays will stead each other over a "like", "crush", etc.. You call that love?! Wait till you break up. Think further. Don't do stupid things. That's my advice.

tip: only start ''stead'ing when you're working(part-time excluded) and after army. you will enjoy happiness till the day you die. I'm waiting for that day...

...
Hmm...
i was hoping for some less direct comments... sigh...
i know that this is not the right time to start a relationship but i don't control my feelings like i do the computer....
i've never taken a fancy to any one before but this girls' really gotten me... what do i do to ease my own burden of seeing her with him... just gets me really worked up sometime sseing the way he treats her... like something taken for granted and to be used and thrown at will... sigh....

~Ruffy... pain broken and frustrated...
:( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :(

relax ah. How can one not control his own feelings? Feelings are yours. Take control.

I know that you want indirect stuff like, "Approach it slowly" or worse, "manipulate". Frankly speaking, i do not feel that these "indirect" statements will work out for you. That's why I told you to give up. Not because I am pissed about people asking these questions but to tell you that having a relationship now will not work out like what you dream to be.

Trust me. There is One who loves you even more. Get to know Him. Don't be a victim of relationships that wont stay. I wish you would make the right choice. Cheers

Did you have a crush on her a long time ago or only after she got together with ur buddy.

you don't like competitions?

llamalamer, good gracious, your 'lurkism' syndrome is gone! :P

Yeah, good advice there, llamalamer.

Hey Ruffy, cheer up lah!

I always believed in a soulmate. Some things cannot be rushed, wait for the ripe moment. :) Just my comments. ;)

- Don't abandon the whole forest because of one tree. :)

Cheer up, mate.

puppy love?ha.. my school teacher told me tt ;)

Fret not, this is part of growing. I was always like this when I was in my teens. You'll meet new girls, you'll have new crushes but you'll get over it. Give yourself some time.

Yo Ruffy thats a real problem you got there. And yesh, I've been there, done that. Well in my world there are 2 kinds of crushes. There's the regular crush, and then there's something called a scrush (super-crush).

Lemme explain abit.

Crush= Look at girl alot. Feel awkward talking to her.

Scrush= Can't stop thinking about her. Can't eat. Can't sleep. Avoid eye contact with girl.

Anyway, scrushes are pure hell. I remember that when I had a scrush last time, I didn't eat anything for an entire day. Yep, nothing except water. My scrush on a girl lasted about 3 months and it was over. Here's a mistake I made. I confessed to her that I liked her, when I was super crazy over her ( she was one of my closest friends). Basically, I wasn't thinking straight and I was too much in love to talk properly. In other words I was behaving differently, and I wasn't the cocky and funny guy that I normally was. So, she accepted the ' go steady ' thing at first but eventually she told me that I wasn't the Nick that I used to be.

Moral of the story? Only confess to girls that you like them, when you have full control over yourself. From my experiences so far, I realise that girls don't really like wussies. In other words, when I acted differently in the example just now, I was acting like a wussy. I wasn't being my usual friendly, funny self.

Well anyway from what I can see, you want to try to hit on this girl without backstabbing your bro. Right? Here's what you gotta do. You MUST NOT hit on her, yet. You shouldn't even flirt. Grow close to her, and try to be funny and friendly. Eventually she'll think you're a great person, you're someone she's comfortable with. After a month or two, she'll call for a break up with her current boyfriend due to a certain argument ( it always happens ). THIS IS YOUR CHANCE TO TAKE HER. If you take too long to hit on her, she'll patch up with her boyfriend and you'll feel like crap again.

Remember, if you want a high chance of success, you have to wait for several months. If you hit on her now, you will lose your bro's respect and thats really important.

Oh just to add on, my way may not be the best. After all, there are many people here who are 20+ years old and they should know better. Heed their advice before you follow mine.

Good luck my friend.

one thing:go look for other gals to look at.or you could wait it out.that's if you can wait that long.so,in general,forget about this gal and look for other gals.

oooohh~~ my lovee~~~
my darling~~~

oops. one friendly advice. find for new girls. not worth quarelling with ur "bro" over a girl.

Scrush... looks like thats the one i'm having... sigh... new gals? i am not really into gals right now but somehow she got me there. as i said she the first one that got me this bad... i think i'll wait... she is worth it.
thanks alot llamalamer for ur advices
and btw i am straight--->"There is One who loves you even more. Get to know Him."

Blackwing, what you are saying is that: get close and wait for the time, is that right?

~Ruffy--> tomented soul
:( :( :( :( :( :( :( :(

I am really sorry if i sounded a bit rude in the last msg... didn't mean to... i meant no offence to any of you guys... and thx :unsure:

Yes get to know her, and appreciate her as a friend. Be her friend and if she breaks up with her current BF, you can go after her. Only go after her if she breaks up with her BF.

. . .
*speechless*
i don't know what to say or think any more,but one thing i do know
--->it is only right if i go for her after their break.

thx ...erm.. for helping me sort out my thoughts

and how do you know if shes really gonna break up with the guy? somethings never happen when u most expect it to be. give up. dun go for someone who is with another person. let them be happy! i mean no offence. but i've encountered experiences where couples are together. but because of the 3rd party.. things happen. the 3rd party unknowingly breaks them up..you dont want them to happen do u ?'

just my 2cents , no offences.

Yeah lukold in my opinion, BGRs always come to a halt after 1-2months. there's always some stupid reason for the 2 lovebirds to argue. Eventually they'll get over it and they'll go back to being happy.

Drop the thought of her, borrow an id, go to a club (Smoothen up your looks first), look for a girl to grind with, get addicted, show her a trick, say this specifically :

"Your eyes are beautiful"

There you go, new 'scrush'.

Your eyes are bee-you-tee-ful?

:blink:

Wuahahahahahahahahhahahahahaha... :!!: :lol: :o :g:

Sorry, no offense Jeremy- you're a sweetie and I know you mean well but really, it's just so darn cheesy (don't hate me!)... it just makes me think of all those lameO pick up lines people try to use but usually... very unsuccessfully.

Maybe you can use this in a pub like Jeremy says (if you're old enough), I don't know... maybe they might work on girls who hit the discos & bars for a reason BUT please...

Don't even use lines like that with girlie that unless you guys are already together or you know for sure the girlie's truly smittened with you as well... else you WILL come across as a wannabe play boy lor :P How can she take you seriously after this if you flub it... and most of the times, lines like that only work in books- read it out loud and say it to yourself in the mirror, you'll probably end up cracking yourself up.

I've never heard it delivered successfully anyway, and guys here really shouldn't try it- unless you're Hitch material (watch that Will Smith movie for clues).

Yeah.

So.

Ruffy, boy in love, just be yourself.

Magic is good, but please don't use it to impress and girl to get her interested in you... it's very... cheap :P I mean, hey, if it's just the tricks you know that gets to her- how about much important things like your personality, what you're about, ...just you!

Also consider this - You may like her but does she feel the same? Only make THE move if you know for sure there's something there. Else you'll be very very very miserable. Make that 'very' to the power of a hundred and two. Or three even.

Why put yourself in peril and remember, good friends don't come easy. I don't know how important it is to you these days when you use the term "big bro/ lil sis" but I'll assume that you really care about that person and to a certain aspect, respect them too :)

It's unfortunate that the girl you happen to fancy is taken by not just anyone but your buddy. I'm no expert in relationships but this is the best advice I can share with you...

Above all things, yes- follow your heart, but use your head as well.

Good luck Ruffy!
ning ^_^

Of course I don’t want them to break up! …It is just that I want my bro to treat her better… I respect her and all I want is for her to be happy no matter with whom. And if that’s the way she feels happy and contented…

I understand what you all are trying to tell me and I have been trying to be my old self again but it isn’t that easy to get her not to pop up in my mind that often…

Btw anybody can tell me the diff btw Breaking the ice, Flirting, and Initiating a conversation starter? I can’t really tell the difference…

~Ruffy

Or you can do what I said in the othe thread, just pop up behind her, say "BUYAKASHA!" and do the dirty deed, then go to your nearest farm and have a Dr. Pepper.

-Kev

Consult Rosie Palm and her five sisters..

Hmm.. pardon me but I don't understand what you mean by 'the dirty deed'... explanation please?

It's the mating proccess, homie!

-Kev

omg! rape! underage????

Haha..Are you from Holy Innocent High?(Pun intended).. :rolleyes:

Hmm..I have a friend who also had the same situation as you.The girl he likED liked his brother instead. But he learnt to let go..Now he is living happily..and he found someone else he like.. :g:

I'm not tellin you to let go like he does, but if you let go, you still can be happy..Lar..

I am trying to forget her...
I am trying but it is

HARD

real hard...

it is tough to...

I understand what you mean but as i said above it is hard...

btw I am from Nan Chiau High

Ur still young Ruffy, long way ahead. Try concentrating on ur studies abit first before relationships.

Oh and a good piece of advice, army = the killer of most relationships. (gd eg. is myself). Sometimes you must learn to adapt to situations. If ur buddy is already attached to her, let that be. There are many others out there right? Can't be ur whole life revolve around this one girl.

Try knowing more people at clubs, through hobbies, or CCAs. And please, please dun ever use magic as a means to get a girl, personally I think it is really bad.

Oh and you can always ask me along if you wanna go drink or club, currently looking for friends to drink with :P

Er... I think our young gentleman here isn't the legal age for drinking yet??? :P Anyways, Markiebeth kor kor here seems to be an expert on BGR *wink* Guess you can learn lots from him lor (hint: he's in a band too, most chicks dig magicians who are also musicians- check with resident flirt Blackwing for clues). Have fun!!!! ;)

Erm...expert failure u mean? Whoops, didn't know ur underaged. BUT!!! So long as you think it's right, there's no stopping you from grabbing that chivas or bleu!!! (just kidding)

Oh and blackwing is the pro? darn, faster pm me and share some tips, thanks in advance.

Hey Markiebeth. Looking for campanions to go drinking with? I always wanna go pubs but no one to accompany. Well actually I prefer to drink and chill at 24hrs kopitiam than clubs. Cheaper and more peaceful.

lols. i havent seen blackwing posting in a while.
he must be meditating , devising a new plan /MWAUAHHAHAHAHA
just kidding.
ruffy , or maybe you can meet me up. im as underaged as you are and in compassvale sec.. oh ya. you can get lingxuan too , and then we'll try to sort out your troubles for you..and more people will come and.. we all start to take out our cards..and we perform magic to lay people . and they get stunned and.. ya.. IT TURNS INTO A MAGIC JAM!!!
great idea eh?
period. >.<

Are you serious? Hmmm where do you stay? Drop me a PM k? Look forward to hearing from you soon then. :)

Lol... haiz... sorry all for the late reply... cant touch the com the past few days... hehe kana locked up by mum...
I would very much meet up with you all... however somethings always seems to crop up the moment i want to go for any meeting related to SMC... sigh...
you go ask ling... she should know pretty much bout that too since she is one of my 2 mediums to SMC... the other which is the com... like the meeting yesterday which i didn't attend cause my dad wanted me to work at his shop...
Lol! Never been so frighten and scared when collcecting money... keep them until my hands and feet are numb... sigh so tired...
by the way lukold you are a guy right... or are you? i can't seem to decide whether you are a gal or a guy... hmmm so just which are you?
or are you the other two hidden choice...?(p.s. i can keep a secret very well!)
And jamming in sengkang seems to be just fine an idea... since it is so close to my home swt home... haha...

~Ruffy
Btw i was just kiddin bout the 2 hidden choice but i really dunno your gender...

IM A GUY!
zZz

lukold is a sexy chio bu who can beat all the guys at a mean game of american pool ;) don't play play!