You know you're a magician IF:

You have to check your change with a magnet and a bang ring before buying a soda.

You can make money appear out of thin air, but still can't pay your bills.

You have a rabbit and two doves, and you don't even really like rabbits or birds.

You look at two hot twin girls and think of magic tricks instead of crazy sex.

You spent more on magic tricks than on your car (Oh god I'm really a magician!)

Almost everything you see in a dollar store you think could be used for magic tricks.

The people at your local thrift stores actually put aside strange junk just for you.

You can't go on vacation with your girlfriend or a wife for a week without dying to check your messages here on the forum.

You've bought 10 stage illusions because the price was right, but you have no idea when you'll be hired to do a stage show, or even if you will ever perform them.

Your wife or girlfriend has threatened to cancel your credit cards due to magical overspending, and you started counting her shoes to justify your own purchases.

Your hired to do a magical birthday party for $100 and the week before, you spend
200$ on new magic "getting ready" for the show.

You find $20 in the pockets of an old pair of pants, and you instantly think "NEW TRICKS!"

You have over 50 decks of cards, and you don't even particularly like card tricks.

While in a casino, you notice some of the dealers tossing decks of cards, and you instantly think of free card nirvana, an entire room or warehouse filled with cards, even though again, you don't particularly even like card tricks.

You do kids shows, even though you have no children of your own because you hate the little brats.

You hate winter simply because the heating cost cuts into your magic trick money.

You hate summer because the air conditioning cuts into your magic trick money.

At christmas, you ask your spouse for magic tricks when you have an entire room full of them already.

While out on the town with your girlfriend or wife, someone recognizes you and asks to see some magic. You explain you can't because you don't really have anything with you,and you then proceed to do 60 minutes of impromptu magic.

You have at least 10 magic tricks you got in the mail or at a shop that you never even opened or read the instructions in full, yet you keep buying new ones.

You come up with a great trick that costs $1.50 to make, and you start selling it for $49.95.

You say "That guy ripped that idea off of me!" and really believe it.

Your girlfriend or wife refuses to empty your pockets anymore when she does the wash.

Your doing a lecture tour but you haven't made a living actually performing magic for people for years.

Your wife or your girlfriend is waiting in your bed to have sex, and your in a mirror practicing that perfect sleight move again.


You paid $10 for a quarter with a bullet hole in it.

You just paid $19.95 for some gimmicked string.

With every package you get in the mail you tell your wife or girlfriend "Thats it I'm done, I've got plenty of magic now" then wonder how your going to hide the other 6 packages on their way to you.

You know your a magician if the soda you just got out of the machine really cost you $50.00..not 50cents

You know your a magician if your 2 yr old starts putting coins in your sleeves at the dinner table.

You find yourself classic palming the TV remote and still pressing buttons with your first and middle finger.

You have dress pants that have holes in the pockets and things sewn to the butt...ON PURPOSE.

If some one else looked in your junk drawer, they would think you were 9 yrs old.

In that drawer there is a button with a string attached that you made... and can't remember why.

You have a shelf in your basement or garage that has 17 different types of adhesives.

5 of them are jars of rubber cement.

The bank tellers start scrounging for half dollars as soon as they see you walk in the door.

You buy cigarettes but you don't smoke.

Your wife or girlfriend refuses to empty your pockets when she does the wash.

You have more thumbtips than friends

You can't pass a thrift store without wondering if they have a perfect case for closeup in there for $2.

You have more 1/2 dollar coins than a coin dealer.

You buy black nylon stockings, and your not a cross dresser!

You just paid $14.00 for a "magic" pencil

You just paid $200 for a magic watch, and you don't usually even wear a watch.

You have more instructional dvd's and tapes than actual movies on your dvd shelf.

You have 4 bottles of lighter fluid around, and you don't even own a zippo.

You started a small business selling magic tricks at a flea market or ebay just to get extra money to buy yourself
new tricks and props.

You just volenteered doing magic at a childrens hospital, and you don't even like kids.

You claim you can also read minds, but people have to draw what they are thinking first.

You actually beleive the ads when they read "Self working, no skill or no funny switches!"

You just bought a white rabbit because it looks better for ONE trick than your first rabbit (a black one!)

Your considering changing girlfriends or wives just to get a hotter assistant.

You sat in a vat of crushed ice for an hour just to see if you could really do a "trapped in ice" stunt.

You walked on hot coals on purpose to see people do that for real or if its really a trick (ouch!)

Your going to vegas instead of disneyland because there are lots of magic shows in vegas.

You no longer leave your house without pockets full of crap JUST IN CASE someone asks you to do a trick,this way you can do 20 tricks....

You take longer getting ready to go out than your girlfriend of wife.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You know if you're a magician if you're unable to count how many times you said, "Yea thats me!". :lol:

Totally hilarious, has everyone made a checklist? :ph43r:

Ahahahaha. i got lost reading halfway. :wacko:

Haha, I saw this on the secret forums made to discuss Subterfuge. Thought I'd share it with you guys. ;)

I couldnt help laughing too. :lol:

OMG! That's checked checked checked...... checked checked checked.. All the way... I've got like 80% checked! :P

Haha... :lol: Very true.. I was reading and thinking , how true indeed.

I definitely admit to this: "You can't go on vacation with your girlfriend or a wife for a week without dying to check your messages here on the forum" Hehe.. ^_^

*clap clap clap*

Whoever came up with this is ingenious. I especially like the parts about carrying crap with you and having drawers full of crap and how we see everything as being linked to magic.

Because that is really me. Haha.

How about a :

"You know you are dating a magician when..." list? B)

I'll start...

- You know you are dating a magician when you hold his/her hand and you find a coin palmed there for absolutely no reason.

- You know you are dating a magician when you've been told "Later, you will pretend you don't know me, and I will try to chat with you and ask you to help me", and it has nothing to do with kinky role-playing.

- You know you are dating a magician when blindfolding your bf/gf doesn't automatically led to some hot action....

:lol:

Aloy,

Your are brilliant!

Possibly related is: http://www.happywomanmagazine.com/Features...ng_magician.htm

Not brilliant...real life experience... :ph43r:

:!!:

Wait till you see Ning's list, it must be like 7 pages long. :lol:

My 7 page long list is actually entitled "You know your boyfriend is a Magician when..." <_<

Wow :!!: 7 pages long. Aloy you must have many magician antics haha... :lol: so I suppose the following 2 are inside:

- You know you are dating a magician when at a restaurant, he is more interested in the cutlery than you.

- You know you are dating a magician when he holds your hand and look deep into your eyes, building the anticipation and instead of saying "You look Lovely tonight". He says "In a moment I'm going to read your mind"

Thats when your date drops her head flat... :lol:

:lol: :lol: :lol:

I swear when we 1st started dating, whenever we eat out, Ning will be bending something before the main course arrives.

This is really funny. Keep them coming guys! Hahaha. :lol:

You know you are dating a magician when he starts proposing to you with some magic trick.

You know you are dating a magician when he has no money to pay for the date because he spent it all on decks of cards.

okie, i took this replies from another site. so not my work. bUT have fun laughing! and rolling eyes too.haha ^_^

You know you're a magician when:

your mouse pad is a close up mat.

you would turn down a night of sex to see Copperfield live.

you walk your bottle caps down your fingertips just to show off.

you spend more time in front of a mirror than your mom and sister combined

you can make everything disapear accept your bills

your out with the family for lunch and you leave your table to go entertain another table.

you can read your girlfriends mind but you dont know what to get for her birthday gift.

you have to check your coins before you get something from a vending machine.

You can stop time, yet you cant get your bills sent in on time

You can stick needles through your arm, pull string through your neck, and push iron stakes through your foot without pain, but getting a small cut or bruse hurts.

if you cut off best friend's thumb just to get a realistic thumb tip

When don't have cards and you're at a restaurant, you order several bowls of soup so u can use the crackers that come with it to sybil and fan with.

if you have a flour bag filled with fanning powder instead of flour

if you have a suit with suits on it

if you pull your friend's hands off when they touch your cards

if your "wand" is a wand.(I think only immature people will understand this)

When you have nothing with u, u practice sybils, double lifts, and passes with the air(kinda like air guitar lol)

you eat a brand of cereal called sleightios.

if you hate fat people

if you think brad christian is hot(okie, not sure why this is here. :lol: )

when you open up a new packet of ghost cards you get slightly turned on

you may be a magician if you pay more than 25 dollars for a quarter (that's coins of course)

you might be a magician if you have ever used "The Great" either before or after saying your name.

if you own more bicycles than any other kid on your block!

if you make sure that you have a certain number of quarters, dimes, and pennies on you at all times.

if you would turn down sex to go to a magic shop.

if you spend more time in front of a video camera than a fashion model.

if your credit card bill is filled with magic things.

if you buy 2 coins (scotch & soda) which you will never use to actually be used as currency.

when you pay for things as you pass over the money or credit card they disapear.

if you levitate when waiting in queues.

use magical jestures when talking.

strain your neck when you hear the word magic being said from behind you.

when you cant go anywhere without having coins or cards on you.

all your friends avoid mentioning the're bored.

you pay 50 dollars for a 1 dollar coin.

you wont play card games with your cards

your girlfriend knows the sound of riffled cards over the phone

while watching a movie, you have cards in your hands

you always have rubber bands on your wrists

your wish list looks like a magic catologue

you use the word effect rather than trick

you see a pack of cards as you read these words.

no one will play cards with you....ever...ever. (thats for sure)

you have more card decks than the casino.

you have your local magic shop on speed dial.

you have more handcuffs than the entire police department.

it really matters how people shuffle your deck.

magic turns you on more than women do. :P

Are the only one in your family that KNOWS david blaine is a bad magician. :ph43r:

Have random cards lying around your living space.

Hold your pencils in tenkai or ciggerate palm.

Hear the word "impromptu" and all you can think of is magic.

play Diablo 2 and someone asks if you have razor's edge and you can't help to think "Jay Sankey?". Haha personal experience but that's all for now.

yeah. so keep it going people! :g:

Aaron

Hmm... I remember my friends commented that my I would unconsciously be doing imaginery flourishings while walking or sitting. I still catch myself doing that from time to time and sometimes passer-bys would give me the wierd look.

And yes, I always have a deck or a half-dollar with me all the time.

But no, I would choose sex anytime over magic... I mean, I learned magic to get the girls in the first place!

You know you are a magician if:
You practise your coin moves even when you were asleep.

At least, that's what my father said i was doing... ^_^

He had seen me waving my arms around when i was sleeping. Apparently i was doing my coin moves upon closer inspection.
I had absoutely no idea i did that even after he told me. :lol:
A. :g:

Oh yea, I do that all the time, practicing my patter or presentation when I'm bored while walking on the road or riding the escalator. Then people will look at me funny. If I notice, I'll glare at them, point a crooked finger in their general direction and mutter something to the effect of, "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" hoping they'll think I'm placing a curse on them.

You know you're a magician when:

People are gushing about their idols Tom Cruise, Lindsay Lohan, and Johnny Depp, and you're gushing about your idols Slydini, Cardini, and Phantini; who all sound like they were rejects from a Mexican children's television show.

LOL... Maddened, good golly, your humour kills :lol: :lol: :lol:

This one is for the girls ---> You know you're a female magi when:

1) You'd rather splurge on magic effects than the latest Coach bag, a spa session, manicure/ pedicure pamper, clothes from Mango, lingerie or funky Birkenstocks!!!

2) You're not in check with the latest trends in the fashion world anymore (is bold prints still the in-thing?!) but you know of EVERY new magic effect or illusions that's just released!!! (like, omg, the funky looking Anti-Grav Levitation that looks really really cool and only limited to 100 sets worldwide!!! *GASP!!!!*)

3) You start playing with your ring accessories... arm bracelets or hoop earrings and start wondering if you can make a gaff & do an impromptu linking rings effect the next chance you get when you're out with friends

4) You really comtemplate doing a paddle move with one of your spare t*****s, ala Jay Sankey in OMG :ph43r:

5) You actually take LONGER to prep to leave the house because you set yourself up for loads like STS and ITR, and bring all sorts of things with you like ropes and rings, even a blindfold or cuffs, but there's no kinky action happening...

6) You imagine doing an impromptu arm through body effect on the nasty person who cut your Q at Sasha's <_<

7) You wear rubberbands more often than any other accesory you own...

8) In the desperate search for something to draw out a prediction with, you'd gladly sacrifice your Shu Uemura makeup pencil or the MAC eyeliner you got for Christmas.

9) You read the stuff in SMC more often than anything featured on Female, Elle, Cleo or Her World :wacko:

10) You are more interested in trying to bend silverware during dinner, than focusing on the guy sitting opposite you (ooops...) :g:

Wuahahahhahahahahhah :lol: ...that's all personal experience, and then some!!!
Ningy ;)

Tick.. Tick.. Tick!!! :lol:
At last... a ladies' version!! :)

You are also a magician if:
You always bring a haversack full of little 'trinkets' and all other people are baffled because you always bring a haversack even when there's apparently nothing that you carry in your bag.

A. :g:

Hahaha, i like the part about checking your coins before payments, haha i always does that, and also lots of incidents when my Girlfriend yell at me for playing with my cards when talking to her on the phone, she actually can hear it!! :g:

Ning's #4 made me think of the Jumping Arrow (http://www.elmwoodmagic.com/?nd=full&key=1038) 'cept it wouldn't be an arrow that jumps around.

OK how about: "You know your a magician when someone offeres you a chop cup for your wife/husband/etc and you figure it would be a fair trade?

A chop cup? No way!!! :blink:










But for the entire Sherwood Cups collection, maybe... :!!:

Ahhhh, a woman attracted to sparkly things.

Men like cups too, no? ;)

Well, sure, but free of gimmikry of any kind. I'm a Charlie Miller Cup kind'a guy. Now, there's a man's cup if ever there was one.

:)

BTW, don't you folks ever sleep?

oh man i have the same habit of practicing my moves without a deck of cards and also trying to get my patter right. then my friends would come up to me thinking i'm all weird and stuff but i'd end up saying...

"Hey wanna see something?"

Haha... Nice one Ningy.

:P

Your know you're a magician if you stay up all night reading forums like this.